First Brisket Temp

We’re in our 8th hour and the brisket is sitting on 150. Hope we can get 40 more degrees in 8 more hours. She’s starting to look good though and definitely seems juicy.

Trouble In BBQ Land

Having trouble keeping the temps in the range I want tonight for some reason and I’m hoping that doesn’t spell trouble with a capital T for this poor brisket. Didn’t help that I fell asleep for a little while only to wake up and find the temps down around 160.

Back up to 253 at this point and we’ll see how the next couple of hours go. I have the feeling this may be one of those nights that ends up with a brisket finishing in the oven.

First Turn

Turned the brisket at 9:30, about 15 minutes late but I was on the phone with my parents. Didn’t get the mop started until just now so it will be another 30 minutes before I get it mopped. Also had a little episode where my timer wasn’t on and the temp got up to 318 but it’s back down to 240 and reasonably steady at this point.

BBQ isn’t difficult but it does take patience and a little bit of foresight to make it work correctly. Brisket is the hardest meat I think to smoke and I’m hoping this one is a little forgiving of my lack of attention. Next turn will be at 10:30 so we’ll see then.

So It Begins

The brisket is room temperature and happily rubbed down with secret stuff. The coals are hot. The smoker is 219 degrees moving towards 235. The hickory chunks are prepared. It’s time to start smoking. 14 pound brisket, 8 PM start time, so that baby should be done tomorrow morning around 10:30 or so. Then the Violated Chicken goes on.

Now the question is, do I work on something interesting or drink beer? Hmmm. . .

Are You An Omnivore?

I have other things to write but they aren’t coming out of my head too well so let’s roll with this. Katy posted this on her blog and since it’s this or clean the house, it was a pretty easy decision.

1) Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Optional extra: Post a comment here at linking to your results.

The VGT Omnivore’s Hundred:

1. Venison

2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes Surely Boones counts?
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes We grew some this year. Got 2 tomatoes from the plant. Sigh.
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas

32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar

37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo

40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat I’ve had goat but I’m not sure it was curried. It was yummy though.
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more This is the Experiment after all.
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut

50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV

59. Poutine Sounds yummy!
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads They’re fried for god’s sake and everything gets better fried.
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake

68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill See the problem with road kill is that the things that get killed in the road usually aren’t things I’d find tasty. Like if someone ran over a Fugu, I’d give it a try. But that’s not saying I wouldn’t eat roadkill. As long as it wasn’t road gumbo, I’d be up for it.
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail

79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict

83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare Does this include jack rabbit? I’ve had it.
87. Goulash
88. Flowers

89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam
92. Soft shell crab

93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano I’ve had mole once and it tastes like ass. I think it’s because they’re blind.
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake

Overall, I think I’d be considered an omnivore. Part of it comes from spending time on the farm hunting and fishing. My granddad had a rule: you shoot, you eat it. That’s a pretty good rule to have. There’s not much I won’t try. I draw the line at most organs involved in nervous system activity or digestive activity. Other than that, I’m game once. Though with lamb, I seem to keep coming back for more, even though I just can’t manage to acquire the taste.

Other things not on the list that I’ve tried: raw fish (guess it’s so passe these days as not to warrant a mention), elk, bison, quail, pheasant, duck, trout caught out of a mountain stream on a 20 mile hike and cooked/smoked over an open campfire (it was way better than the rations we were packing along), and dove. I like quail and pheasant but you don’t get it much if you don’t hunt which I don’t anymore.

Taste Of Home Plug

If you’re ever in the Wylie metro area, you should check out Taste Of Home restaurant which is a local, home grown spot that has nice charm and good food. I was going to write a review but decided it sounded lame and boring. Just go eat there, it’s good. Mom’s meat loaf is highly recommended and the Almond crusted tilapia is tasty as well. The sweet tea is a little suspect for a southern restaurant but it’s not the worst stuff I’ve had.

Abominations of Nature

Typically, anything with that descriptor is hyperbole designed to incite specific responses.  For example, if I say that a three-way between two women and a horse is an abomination of nature that God will surely punish, that’s clearly just a sign of my bias against alternative expressions of sexuality and an exhibition of my closeted kinks.

However, Whataburger’s making sweet tea with some horrific synthetic sweetener like Splenda is truly an affront to all that is pure and holy as laid down in the specific sections of Revelations related to making sweet tea.  God clearly understood the southern tradition and would never stand for such blasphemy.  Sweet tea is made from sugar, preferably in a glass pot on the porch for 3-4 hours on a sunny day.  Any other means of “sweet tea” creation truly deserves to be struck down by the mighty sword of Truth.

In other Whataburger news, the new BBQ Ranch Whatachicken is mouthgasmic, its 720 calories and 37 grams of fat, notwithstanding.   Sweet Mercy.

Why Is French Bread So Much Better

Alex Tabarrok writes about his Le problème du pain while in France. Lots of interesting comments on the subject over there but I would argue the problem is twofold.

1. The ingredients you have available in France are probably of a much higher quality, i.e. the grains are likely to be less processed, the butters and fats are likely to be richer, etc.

2. You’re in France, nearly everything seems better in France. The wine is better, the air is better, the hot pizza oil is better. (This is really an argument from my better half really, but one that I have some sympathy with). It is well-known that your state of mind greatly affects your perception of the world and being in France on vacation has to come into play. One of the interesting comments talks about how French housewives loved the American style Wonder bread for its ease of use and length of freshness. Again, your state of mind and perception of things are important.