An Experiment In Scotch

I write to discover what I believe

Month: August 2006 (page 1 of 2)

Daddy! Daddy! Look at the kittens!

So let me get this straight, in exchange for cooperating, Justin Gatlin of Olympic and 100 meter fame was going to get to avoid a lifetime ban from his sport. Showing mercy, the U.S Anti-Doping Agency gave him an 8 year ban. Ummm, guys, he’s 24. 24 + 8 = 32. No one runs the 100 meters when they are 32. In effect, an 8 year ban is a life time ban by another name.

If I’m Gatlin, guilty or not, I’m going to immediately renege on that deal and tell them to take a flying leap. Track and Field is no different from boxing if you ask me. I say let them take whatever they want. Who cares? Why pretend? I just want to see them run fast.

Katie It's Never Too Late

If Paramount can dump Tom Cruise for his stupid and insane behavior, so can you. Don’t worry, your career can be revived after this silly little misstep. If not, there’s always Cinemax.
Tom should have to wear baggy pants around his thighs. Though that episode on Oprah should suffice really.

Saggy Pants Are Dragging Us Down

Dallas school trustee Ron Price wants the City Council to ban saggy pants inside the Dallas city limits. Ron Price, who apparently wants to run for City Council, thinks it’s disrespectful and dishonorable to women for men to wear their pants around their thighs. Bill Blaydes, already a member of the esteemed Dallas City Council, thinks it’s an embarassment to our city if we can’t keep our pants up.

Women and citizens of Dallas, I call on you to inform Ron Price and Bill Blaydes that you firmly support the right of men (or women, though sadly, few women walk around with their skirts around their thighs and their thongs showing) to wear their pants around their thighs with their underwear showing. Tell them you believe this is a fundamental right.

But mostly tell them that you are against this law because if it passes, how will you easily be able to tell which men NOT to breed with? Outward signs of stupidity are becoming harder and harder to discern and thus, stupidity seems to propagate much faster these days.. For the love of God and the strength and speed of the gene pool, let your voices be heard.

UPDATE: Only Council members Hunt and Griffin show any sanitys at all.

News The Left Won't Read

You mean, Bush’s program for AIDS in Africa might be working? Funny, it’s not getting much attention.

Dave Chappelle Chooses Mac

Genius Mac spoof.

When It's Time To Go

I don’t really have time to add much to this story but the man is right, if it’s time to go, it shouldn’t be this difficult. When and/or if that time comes for either K or I, I truly hope something has been done to the political landscape to ease the burden of dying with some dignity. No one should have to go through that.

Maurice Clarett Arrested Again

This time, he had 4 loaded guns in his car and was Maced after a stun gun didn”t do anything because he was wearing a bullet-resistant vest. This guy is a nut case waiting to kill someone, probably a cop given his spectacular disdain for authority. I hope that he gets the book thrown at him and gets locked away long enough to mellow him out a tad.

So sad that a player with what was probably NFL talent squandered it all away through a combination of bad advice, stupid decisions and apparently a reckless regard for reality.

Alert Mom Breaks Up Daughter''s Strip Tease

Ok this is totally not work safe (topless daughter involved) but it”s HILARIOUS. The title says it all.

(I had to play it twice to get the video to work.)

Orgasm or Excellent Marinara?

I link, you decide.

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